Five Possible Running Mates For John McCain

John McCain has just announced that he is compiling a list of possible running mates for the upcoming Presidential election. This is arguably the first and most difficult choice that a prospective President needs to make.

In McCain's case, because of his advanced years, it is even more critical that he make the right choice (though any choice that McCain makes will surely come from the right).

Choosing the right VP has a long and honourable tradition in American politics going right back to the beginning when John Adams became the first Vice President in George Washington's administration.

Over the years the office of Vice President has been largely ignored, shunted off to a distant part of the White House and only used on ceremonial occasions such as lesser state funerals.

Officially the Vice President is President pro tempore of the Senate and holds the deciding vote in the event of a tie.

However, in the past, we have seen Vice Presidents who have had to come forward, usually under sad conditions, to assume the office of President. Many rise to meet the challenge of their new assumed office these would include Theodore Roosevelt, Harry Truman and Lyndon Johnson. Others have brought less dignity to the office including Andrew Johnson, Richard Nixon and Dan Quayle.

So you can see that the choice of a running mate is extremely important. Quite often a Presidential candidate will appoint an advisor to help choose possible candidates. That's what George Bush (the lesser) did when he asked Dick Cheney to compile a list of possible running mates while he went off to play the back nine at Pebble Beach.

And we all know how that worked out... Not only did Dick recommend himself as Vice President but he also came along as President so George wouldn't have to do any deep thinking.

So with this admittedly long winded background out of the way we now get to the matter at hand, who should McCain put on his short list of possible Vice Presidents?

First there are the obvious choices, those candidates who would meet the litmus test of the far right wing of the GOP. These candidates would have to include Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee.

But I think that McCain can do better, so here are some suggestions.

Steven Colbert - this veteran news anchor certainly has the conservative credentials as demonstrated nightly on his popular broadcast "The Colbert Report". Hell, he was already Huckabee's named choice for the position and would bring the huge constituency of his "Colbert Nation".

Hillary Clinton - at first may seem like an odd choice, but bear with me on this. First, she was a card carrying Goldwater Republican until she met Bill in college. She has foreign policy experience up the ying-yang (who better to answer that phone at three o'clock in the morning). Third, she can help to deliver the all important female vote. And finally, forth and most importantly, she has single handedly done more to destroy Democratic chances in the coming election.

Paris Hilton - would bring a certain something back to the White House (white noise perhaps). Like Hillary she would help to deliver a significant portion of the female vote (especially those who live in trailer parks and carry small animals around in large handbags). Hilton is also remarkably free of any political baggage as well. To date she has expressed no thought that in the least could be considered political. And let's face it; Paris does attract an entire press corps all on her own.

Roger Clemens - would attract a strong following among those NASCAR dads who prefer their sports heroes to be straight shooters. Clemens would bring added juice to McCain's campaign. And as of late this seven time Cy Young award winner has been spending a more time in Washington than he has on the pitching mound.

Dr. Phil McGraw - let's face it Ophra's endorsement would be worth its weight in gold to McCain and what better way to get it then by choosing her anointed psych guru as your running mate. Having Dr. Phil close at hand could also help McCain to deal with his rage issues. Dr. Phil would be the perfect running mate for this Manchurian Candidate.

So there you are; five excellent choices as a potential McCain running mate. Each one would bring his, or her, own special cachet to the Republican ticket.